Media Reports, politicians and Leadership

My boss went to the USSR in the 1960's and the left wing head of a local religious organization with whom he traveled gave a glowing report about the conditions there. Religious freedom exceeded our own according to this man. Utopia was just a few years away, he reported. When I asked my boss what he saw, Bill replied, "That guy was on a different trip than I was."

Our political/theological persuasion certainly affects our perceptions and conclusions. My religious convictions influence the ways I see abortion, war, helping the poor and ministry to the world. It influences the ways I perceive the news reports about Katrina.

Sitting up here in the Nawth, I am not sure if the wind even blew in the Gulf States. With all the hot air coming from the politicians offices one could assume that some person's bad political decision caused all the damage. If we are to believe USA Today it was George Bush that
broke the sea wall down and flooded New Orleans.

As a family therapist I have learned over the years to assess the maturity of a person by how "Reactive" they are to any crisis. If one responds with thoughtfulness and personally states his/her opinions, ideas, concerns and insights he/she is assumed to be fairly mature. If, on the other hand, one "Reacts" with Shame, Blame and Names, he/she is assumed to be emotionally
unable to state his/her own ideas but project them onto others.

I learned this when I studied with Dr. Edwin Friedman in Washington, D.C. He said that media people and politicians nearly always dropped out of therapy because their "Reactivity" served them well. If they got more rational and peaceful they would have to quit their jobs, so they would rop out of counseling lest they get better.

Dr. Friedman also said that it is the primary job of media to raise the level
of angst in the community for that is what sells their news programs.

So, do not expect the media to start giving us good news any time soon.

This also applies to many religious groups who raise interest and money with crisis reports about the people they are trying to help. Bad news gets people interested in helping.

We can assess the maturity of our members, or ourselves, by how we respond to crisis, change and stress. Just preach a sermon about any controversy and the people who respond thoughtfully but with challenge are fairly mature. They can state their own ideas and emotions without attacking you. But those who have a great deal more growth to go will attack and call you names.

Or, when attendance drops, giving fails or some member leaves and gossips, how do we leaders feel? Do we "React" by blaming others or blaming ourselves? Do we go into a deep emotional slump and consider leaving the ministry? That indicates our immaturity and our need to get our identity from performance. Driven leaders spend a lot of time in "Image Management" and it drains us emotionally and spiritually and leads to burn out.

A mature leader responds by looking rationally at his/her own behavior as well as others but does not "React" with B. S. (Blame and Shame with Accusatory Names.) Mature leaders assess performance and respond accordingly. Humility leads to personal changes and personal growth.

(Want to learn from Dr. Friedman? Get his book: Generation to Generation; Family Processes in the Church and Synagogue.)